Today i say goodbye to tumblr forever.  It only pains me to log on here and read things which i cannot understand/change.  This experience only seems like research i was doing for a paper i had been writing for the longest time.  And ive finally come to the last chapter.  Except in this paper, i was the one written off.  It was a stupid mistake i will never make again, never again.  If destroying my final attempt to reach out to someone was your goal, then you’ve succeeded.  And i hope you get what you want in life.  You could say i taste the bitterness of being alone and that its what i deserve for thinking i could love someone, but i say that its not bitterness but resentment for the word “love”.  I’ve heard you say a million times, “I just don’t want to get hurt.”  Did you ever think that maybe I was the one going to get hurt?  I could tell it was all going down hill, the conversations became bland, i began to fade, and surely enough i vanished into a painting of nothing more than pain and grief in which i will be lost forever.  It sucks, it really does, to know that the one thing i loved and cared for the most in the world seems to forget i even existed.  Please forgive me if this seems to be wrong to you, because you may see things different.  But this is how I view things, and nothing will change that, not now, not ever.  The only thing i can do is offer advice and be on my way, don’t grow up hiding behind books, poems, other people.  Live your life, experience things YOU want to experience.  Don’t wait until the time is “right” for you to make a move.  Time is never “right” to us, time is only “right” to itself.  Live like you have never lived a day in your life, Love like its the first time you were in love, Open your eyes to things that seem hidden but are blatent, Remember how you got to where you were.

With much love,

Josh

gorgeous

(via tasteslikeglitterr)

lisur:

We cling to music, to poems, to quotes, to writing, to art because we desperately do not want to be alone. We want to know we aren’t going crazy & someone else out there knows exactly how you’re feeling. We want someone to explain the things we can’t.